Sortof Animal wars sortof not #1: Sasquatch vs El Chupacabra

biochemitra · #1 May 21st, 2006, 03:47 PM

I considered putting this in the fantasy battlezone but decided not to since this features real creatures(Ok, depending on who you ask...) so I figured it would be more akin to the animal or dino wars series.

I thought this would be interesting because rather than using movies or comics for information, it would use physical evidences and sightings regarding the combatants' abilities.

Sasquatch is as we know him, this one being a fully grown male. As reports of family sightings go, the male is the second largest in the family, surpassed only by the hulking female. As reports go, they are dominantly herbivorous but can and do hunt and kill deer and dogs. This is of the north american variety for ease of research.

El Chupacabra is assumed to be a fully grown female in this case, probably having a height of about 5 or 6 feet with claws at least two and a half inches in length(One man reports a chupa with two inch claws scratching at his car. The animal in questionw asn't described as being very big either) Legs that can propell her at least thirty feet straight up and a chameleonic ability that may provide some camouflage.

The arena is a large open meadow surrounded by a tropical jungle which should put both creatures in their homefeild.

Tokyo VigilanteX · #2 May 21st, 2006, 04:54 PM

For now, Iam going with Chupo just because theres no real report on the durability/strength of Sasquatch. While the Chupo has taken out 1500 lbs bulls and repeatedly shot with out any sign of injury.

biochemitra · #3 May 21st, 2006, 04:56 PM

We can probably estimate Sassy's toughness to be about equal to the animal he most resembles=the gorilla. Tightly packed muscles means it can shrug off blunt blows but is far from bulletproof. Of course a large one could probably take a few shots before croaking...there have been stories of the apes being shot and killed but overall, I would assume a large specimen could take a few hits before dying, just as a bear.

Morgoth · #4 May 22nd, 2006, 07:47 AM

I've been trying to concoct a script for just this scenario. Tell me that doesn't scream 'Sci-fi channel crappy movie of the week'.

Cole Deschain · #5 May 22nd, 2006, 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgoth

I've been trying to concoct a script for just this scenario. Tell me that doesn't scream 'Sci-fi channel crappy movie of the week'.

Too highbrow for sci-fi.

Tokyo VigilanteX · #6 May 22nd, 2006, 11:31 AM

Quote:

I've been trying to concoct a script for just this scenario. Tell me that doesn't scream 'Sci-fi channel crappy movie of the week'.

Actually, I think a "Sasquatch Vs Mothman" scenario would work better. I don't see a Cryptid in Peurtio Rico fighting something from North America without some absurd plot.

Unless, you've got something else in mind.

biochemitra · #7 May 22nd, 2006, 03:13 PM

In the hands of a true artist, anything can be done and anything can be done right. There IS a way to get the two together into a battle that is actually interesting and semi-serious(the concept itself kinda lends itself out to camp) and one day, people, I'll find that way and I'll write the story...

I wouldn't trust sci-fi to even make it entertaining. I saw what they did to my chupy... It may wind up an entertaining monster brawl but a cryptid movie is so much more...

Morgoth · #8 May 23rd, 2006, 06:17 PM

Oh, hate to burst your bubble, but every 'family' encounter I've read always points out that the male sasquatch is bigger, going back as far as Albert Ostmann's abduction report from the 1920's. Which would make sense, in all primates the male is larger than the female (look at gorillas, orangutans and even people (allowing that McDonald's has not influenced the results).

biochemitra · #9 May 23rd, 2006, 09:30 PM

Well the primary kidnapping account I've read described the female as a tank.

Though I find it easy to beleive that hulking monsters exist in both genders, just as in humans.

Retro_Metroid · #10 June 4th, 2006, 03:28 PM

Hmm... This is tough. A big, furry ape against a blood-suckin' lizard.
*pretends to think this over*

I know! Mr. T! *goes back to seriousness* El Chupa would win.

SuperXAsh · #11 October 13th, 2006, 11:21 PM

Well all the reports I've heard of El Chupa, it's, at most, like 3-4 ft tall.

People have claimed to shoot Bigfoot/Sasquatch as well, and depending on the report... having little to no effect.

I'm going with Sasquatch. Most of Chupa's victims are simple animals like Goats, Dogs, Sheep, Cows, etc. and/or at night. Cheapy B-movies aside, I'd like to see El Chupacabra face down something that could put up more of a fight.

Gorjirus · #12 October 13th, 2006, 11:28 PM

Brock Sampson kills chupacabras.
Brock Sampson let the sasquatch live.

Sasquatch wins.

Cole Deschain · #13 October 14th, 2006, 01:39 AM

Sasquatch is stronger than the Thing, and a nuclear physicist to boot. Langowski wins.

Ultimate goji · #14 October 14th, 2006, 06:02 AM

El chupocabra would dice sassy to bits,

biochemitra · #15 October 14th, 2006, 10:10 AM

Quote:

Well all the reports I've heard of El Chupa, it's, at most, like 3-4 ft tall.

People have claimed to shoot Bigfoot/Sasquatch as well, and depending on the report... having little to no effect.

There are just as many reports of chupacabras being shot at, also with little to no effect.

Quote:

Sasquatch is stronger than the Thing, and a nuclear physicist to boot. Langowski wins.

I'm talking about the real sasquatch.

Quote:

Most of Chupa's victims are simple animals like Goats, Dogs, Sheep, Cows, etc. and/or at night.

And bulls, don't forget the bulls.

Kaiju_Sensai · #16 October 24th, 2006, 01:01 AM

Well if Bigfoot gets ahold then by by Chupacabras. I like chupa better, but Bigfoot has been know to mark their territory by twist tree branches some reportedly 5 inches thick.