The Zombies Are Coming...With Science!

Burkion · #1 November 6th, 2007, 07:42 PM

http://www.cracked.com/article_15643...ly-happen.html

I would like to say this: Grab your Handbooks and your shot guns! THE ZOMBIES ARE COMING!

Cole Deschain · #2 November 6th, 2007, 07:56 PM

Handbook?

HANDBOOK?!

Burk, you'd better not be implying that I DON'T spend my days in a state of zombie-slaughtering preparedness.

Zigra · #3 November 6th, 2007, 08:12 PM

Bah, if the zombies are as easy to put down as Romero's zombies, we've got nothing to worry about. Also, I must say that site's scientific knowledge about the Mad Cow Disease is absolutely laughable.

#4 November 6th, 2007, 09:24 PM

Great. Now all the zombie obessesed gore freaks won't ever shut up. Well, remember one thing:

"Swords don't need reloading"

Cole Deschain · #5 November 6th, 2007, 09:27 PM

They also can't be used from nearly a mile off.

BS Digital Q · #6 November 6th, 2007, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cole Deschain

They also can't be used from nearly a mile off.

Unless you've got Gin's zanpukto.

GMK12 · #7 November 7th, 2007, 07:16 AM

I wonder if Castlevania rules appy to real zombies... as in blessed weapons do a ton more of damage than normal weapons do...

godofPH · #8 November 7th, 2007, 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GrandMasterKaiju12

I wonder if Castlevania rules appy to real zombies... as in blessed weapons do a ton more of damage than normal weapons do...

In that line of thought, I'm going to go steal my friend's Crusades-style sword...

Orga777 · #9 November 7th, 2007, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BS Digital Q

Unless you've got Gin's zanpukto.

Or Cole's favorite, Sephiroth's sword.

biochemitra · #10 November 8th, 2007, 12:37 PM

Here's why the traditional view of the zombie apocalypse AINT gonna happen.

Zombies, with the exception of rage zombies, act on primal instinct, namely, to feed. Ok, so if a zombie needs food, it'll turn to any source, even flesh... right?
Assuming even, that this is true, live prey will be any zombie's last resort. Much easier to raid trash cans, fridges and pick up garbage off the sidewalks. And even then, zombies would most likely find one another to be easier prey than strong, living humans.

Secondly, if they do operate on basic instinct, tell me, blokes, what's the most prominant instinct out there, second to eating? Why, the instinct to mate! So, in addition to raiding people's garbage, such theoretical zombies would spend most of their time humping one another.

Third, and most importantly, there are more people alive today than have ever died in the course of history. Unless something zombifies thousands of people at once, zombies have no chance of taking over the world. And even if such a thing did happen, they would be too busy fighting and copulating to really have the inititative to acheive world-dominance.
They're just not a very efficient army of doom, and the realistic take on them even less so.

Zigra · #11 November 8th, 2007, 05:59 PM

Once again, if we're talking about classical Romero zombies, then they won't have the drive to mate and reproduce. Romero zombies only have the drive to feed, and they only feed on fresh meat, whether it be from live humans or live animals.

But, then again, as I said before, if we experienced the sudden appearance of Romero-style zombies, our real world military force would ground those things into paste. Seriously, the zombies from the original Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead were extremely weak and easy to push past and take down. A small group of just four people were able clean out an entire mall packed with them, and that biker gang was having a field day with them. I really don't see how those things were able to overrun the planet like they did. They certainly wouldn't be a match for the military in real life.

biochemitra · #12 November 9th, 2007, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Once again, if we're talking about classical Romero zombies, then they won't have the drive to mate and reproduce. Romero zombies only have the drive to feed, and they only feed on fresh meat, whether it be from live humans or live animals.

Which is, of course, unrealistic.

Quote:

But, then again, as I said before, if we experienced the sudden appearance of Romero-style zombies, our real world military force would ground those things into paste. Seriously, the zombies from the original Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead were extremely weak and easy to push past and take down. A small group of just four people were able clean out an entire mall packed with them, and that biker gang was having a field day with them. I really don't see how those things were able to overrun the planet like they did. They certainly wouldn't be a match for the military in real life.

Couldn't agree more. Shaun of the Dead illustrated that quite well.